Did I have a dream ------------
Manama, Alwefaq Holiday Villa (the Mermaid Report) —
President for life of AlWefaq, Ali Salman last week called upon the nations of the world to “once and for all ban the contemptible and scandalous practice of holding elections after a boycott had been called.”
“Like many Bahrainis, I was shocked and offended by the holding of the recent Municipal and Parliamentary elections given the boycott ” Salman said in a prepared statement. “The democratic trends portrayed when 52.6% of registered voters turned out against my will, represent a gross violation of my societies values.”
“The holding of the election was a crime against all of us,” he added. “Not just those of us who have boycotted them in the past, but every one of us who might want to boycott them in the future.”
Saying of the elections “the horrifying result had inspired him" he proclaimed, “As long as I hear voices in my head, I will do everything in my power to eradicate the scourge of democratic elections from the face of the Earth.”
Salman concluded his statement by calling for an international conference on the issue of boycotting elections. “I ask all the great nations of the world to stand with me and expose the hypocrisy of ignoring my boycotts, ‘This is not what we stand for,’ ” Salman said. “The will of the people cannot be considered democratic unless first asserted by guiding theocratic clergy”.
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Based on the Brilliant satirical piece written by Andy Borowitz mocking Former Vice-President Dick Cheney please see below
Andy Borowitz is a New York Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes the Borowitz Report for newyorker.com.
Cheney Calls for International Ban on Torture Reports By Andy Borowitz